A Retrospect

I held the picture next to thin air
Frozen reality and real life just doesn't compare
Crumbling and broken, the structure about to give
I gaze upon the home in which my grandfather used to live.

I remember visiting as a small child
The train journey from London to Yorkshire with which I was not beguiled
Picking turnips and cabbages from his vegetable patch
Collecting eggs from the chickens and boiling them before they hatched

I meander sombrely to the old back yard
The once vibrant flower beds rather sparse
Although wartime had started and times were hard
He always used to find time to lie with me in our garden and stare at the stars.

Alas I grew older and the visits became more infrequent
Adolescence hit and I no longer craved his company nor his quiet contentment
Then the bombs dropped from the sky and that all but sealed our fate
To Kent I was sent and we could only communicate through letters that arrived late.

In the summer of forty-five I decided to see him again
As he greeted me at his front door I realised all mutual affection had been retained
All my worrying and fretting about lost connections had been in vain
Though I now had a husband, job and kids our relationship would be almost the same.

My mother had perished in the war
And my father was never around, not even before
So my grandfather took the role of dad and he filled it with pride
And it filled me with happiness that I had this warm, loving soul in which I could confide.

All was well until tragedy struck in sixty-two
Cancer had come to call but we hoped he would pull through
As he underwent various treatments and therapies we anxiously played the waiting game
But the war with cancer was lost and he smiled without regret as Thanatos extinguished his flame.

At the funeral I wept without retention
I had lost a father figure and a best friend; he'd left a lasting impression
He'd become like a dad to my partner and kids too
Like vines up a wall, jointly, our sorrow grew.

And here I stand, dead still in this roughed up flowerbed
So with the rain starting to fall and a tear in my eye it's back to the car I tread
And the house is still broken and damaged and although I wish it to be fixed
It's damaged beyond repair, it's gone, I just have to let it go and move on.