The Tale of Sam Donaldson

In an Ancient Place,
in the middle of a field,
by the edge of a pond,
our hero is revealed.
Sam Donaldson sits,
in the driving rain,
watching it fall and 
lamenting his pain.
He's picking his nose
as he contemplates life,
and the despicable cad
who's run off with his wife.
Bobfry Herpledink,
the landowner's son,
their passions aflame
before the affair had begun.
But, Sam conceded,
with remarkable haste,
what he hated most about Bobfry
was his terrible taste.
Sam's wife was a looker,
that's not what he meant:
it was the shade of Bob's wallpaper
that caused Sam offence.
He really detested
Bob's gaudy rose walls
But Sam's wife 'Queen of Red'
was clearly enthralled.
Every wall at Herpledink Manor
was painted crimson red:
that's what made her leave Sam
alone in his bed.
Well, when I say alone,
that's not strictly true:
a dancing bear kept him company,
a dancing frog too.
They helped him get over
that bitch who loved red,
and rather than get angry
he took a design course instead.
So now he designs interiors
for the good and the great,
which stops him being consumed
by anger and hate.
But as Sam sat by the pond
and considered his lot,
he remembered something
he'd completely forgot:
the 20 tins of green paint
that were sitting in his shed,
and a plan for revenge
formed deep inside of his head.
He'd sneak into Bobfry's Manor
And paint it deepest green
while decorating his own walls
the brightest red ever seen.
Fast forward 10 years
Sam and wife live in bliss,
as his interior re-design
had ended with their kiss.